That’s it. That’s the whole story. I have no further point to the blog post other than just wanting to write something.
But I don’t know what to write.
That’s problematic for a blog post.
…
I know what I want it to be.
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Today, I opened up the paper to find a review of the show I'm working on in the Los Angeles Times. And that was really freaking cool! I wasn't mentioned by name or anything, but right there in black-and-white were the names of the people I'd been working with for the last two months. These were people I had dinner with, people I shout directions at daily, people I tease or praise or laugh at every night. They were just people to me, but in that moment I was overwhelmed by their celebrity.
And my first thought was, "Have I made it?"…
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I started tap lessons this week. It's fun, because I've always liked watching tap and it seemed like the perfect dance genre to start with when you're as out of shape as a pile of Play-Doh--which I am. I'm pretty good at rhythm too, and I liked the idea of my feet becoming little drummers. It's a useful skill in performance, and I need to gather as many of those as I can, so I figured: why not?
It had been awhile since I was in a dance class, and I had forgotten what made me so afraid of them until I stepped into the room...
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I have a lot of cool friends. Some of them are actors, some are techies, some are writers, and some just exist in a universe of nerdiness that I can only hope to enter one day. All these things make them really wonderful people to talk to and listen to and stalk on the internet.
But I also have a problem. (Not the stalking, that's totally normal.)...
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In my attempt to claw my way into the entertainment industry, I'm faced with this question a lot. It's exhausting, because I'm in an industry that requires that I be both--I have to be both mechanically disciplined and soulfully authentic. As an artist, I'm supposed to take risks, open my heart, create out of a desire to tell the truth and say what I think and feel. But as my personal agent, I have to think logically, keep in line, be polite, not speak out of turn or else I might burn bridges. That wouldn't be good for business. The nature of the industry itself requires that I be oxymoronic.
Even as I write this, I think...
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